It isn't uncommon for couples in a hurry to wed to be disappointed to learn that their pastor requires premarital counseling. You may feel that your relationship is absolutely solid, and couples' counseling is a waste of your time, but many of life's trials are unfathomable until you've lived through them. Here are two reasons your pastor might require premarital counseling before officiating your wedding.
Getting Ahead of Common Disagreements
In the haze of young love, you probably find that you agree with your partner a lot more than you disagree. This is normal and healthy, but some of life's biggest decisions don't present themselves until you've already been married for a while.
One poignant example is the monumental decision of starting a family. Do you want children? When? How many? How do you want to discipline them? Will they attend public or private school? What role will your faith play in their lives? These are big questions, and many new parents find they don't agree on their answers.
Another common source of contention in many a marriage is money. Will you save up and pay for your children's college? How much of your income do you want to save for retirement? Which one of you will work, or will you both work? What will the division of housework and childcare duties look like with your work situations? Seeing your clergymen before you marry can help you iron out the answers to these important questions, so you're starting your life out on the same page instead of opposite ends of a tug of war.
With the rise in divorce rates, it is no surprise that the clergymen responsible for bringing couples together wish to keep them from the turmoil that is separation. By discussing common marriage pitfalls prior to the wedding day, many disagreements can be prevented, but even more important, you will learn problem solving skills that will help you deal with any challenges that arise. You will learn effective communication skills, which are the foundation of a strong marriage, and you will also learn that the door is open, and when the going gets rough, you can seek help to prevent divorce with your pastor.
Being in a hurry to get married is a natural consequence of true love. Taking the time to slow down and get started on the right foot will go a long way in preventing rocky roads later on. Consider christian family counseling for other issues as well.